empty

Distancing myself ? nope. Why should I ? Tpi emng kerasa sih feels like I’m in a dormant mode inside of a turtle shell gitu.. ga tertarik sama apa-apa…. I keep doing things that bored me so much, main game.. ga asik.. apa ya..
lagi kekurangan antusiasme. Gatau kenapa, kaya hilang arah. Mungkin…
mungkin..
hm.. sepertinya saya tahu ada apa dengan saya. 🙂

dm dm dm…

I think it is already hard for her to lost a son once, and it can not be helped that she is hopeless and a worrywart when it comes to her sons. But how could I took it ? her cries and her despair. just wanna go back to Jogja asap.
It’s depressing, another little part of me is dying again. Ha ha ha..

mom

and there she is. crying again.

Questioning one self.

if Only you had a chance, to came back through your life and restart all over again. will you do that ? will you changed your choices, changed your decisions, or just retake all that choices that you’ve made this far ?

Is it how big the things you gained after losing things, or how big the things you lose to gaining things that made the things precious ? Does sacrificing more mean you’re currently doing something precious ? or.. the other way around ?
doesn’t things that precious didn’t made you feel sacrificing anything ? so.. do I had the least love for them ? Weren’t they precious enough for me that it changed my decisions over times? then why do I felt myself being sacrificed ? Why do I felt like I’m the victim here, when I actually voluntarily doing things ?

why ? which ? and what ? I do not know.